Blaming someone else or calling them names is simply a way of discharging feelings you don’t want to experience: shame, resentment, anger, disgust, embarrassment, confusion.
It’s far more skilful, and more helpful to everyone, to be able to tell what you’re feeling and then ask yourself:
(1) what unmet need or unfulfilled longing is this feeling revealing to me?
and
(2) what’s my own part in addressing it?
Please, stop discharging by spraying accusations all over the place. And stop handing all the responsibility to someone else to sort it out for you.
And, please, catch your urge to blame before it blossoms, and use its energy as an invitation to step in, for the sake of all of us.
