Somebody is in need.
Time to jump in.
That way I know I’m being of use.
That way I can feel good about myself.
That way I know I’m needed.
But I have to ask
Am I helping the person in difficulty?
Or am I making this all about me
Helping myself, and not the other?
And could I assist in a different way…
…One that actually does something?
For some fabulously clear advice on this question, read The Ring Theory of Helping. It’s of value in all kinds of crises – medical, existential, organisational.
And it answers a most important question when we want to be of use – not whether, but who to help.