In this episode, Lizzie and I talk about the inner ‘predator’ or ‘inner critic’ force that keeps us small and living – essentially – a life that’s not fully our own. We consider the kind of power that’s required from each of us to break free of this constraint so we can claim our own lives, and how this inner move is profoundly connected to our capacity to exercise power in healthy and life-giving ways in the world around us.
Along the way we consider how it’s only really possible to do this work in relationship with others (hence the importance of community, and the contribution of our profession of coaching), and we imagine a world in which the marketing messages that bombard us each day remind us of our dignity, goodness and nobility instead of trying to fuel the critic by showing us how we might ‘improve’ ourselves all the time.
Our source is Jose Enciso’s poem ‘I’m Talking to You!’, reproduced here with Jose’s permission.
You can find out more about Jose and his work on his website http://www.setthetruthfree.com
I’m talking to you!
Long into the night
and still long to the dawn
Past the parade of losses
and betrayals of self
wrought of service to the wrong god.
Awoken from a fitful slumber
bathed in regret and remorse.
A protest profound arises
deep within my grief.
A holy howl
screaming at the thief.
Hey! I’m talking to you!
Yes, you, in the corner,
slinking and smirking.
You, who kept me down all these years.
You, who gave me crumbs
and told me it was a life.
This is not my life!
This is insecurity,
I’m sorry if I offended thee.
This is grovel and hovel.
that will keep you safe and sound.
You broke into my house
and rearranged all the furniture.
You stole my childhood
and made me a caricature.
Hey! I’m talking to you!
I want my life back.
Not this check and double check,
doubt and re-doubt.
Me, the nice guy with no backbone.
Me, the nice guy who doesn’t even know if he wants Mexican or Chinese.
(mmm, I don’t know, what do you want?)
Me, the noble, beautiful, kind man
who only sees ugliness and embarrassment in your mirror.
I have given away too much.
I have lain down deep in despair.
I have – almost – given up hope.
But, you have not won yet.
Right now, I’m calling you out.
I am not ready to die
in a house decorated by someone else.
Lizzie Winn and I are live every Sunday morning at 9am UK time for the thirdspace coaching ‘Turning Towards Life‘ project. You can join our facebook group to watch live, view archives, and join in the growing community and conversation that’s happening around this project.