Please understand this:
If you want to stay in relationship with another, you can’t force them to change to suit you.
Yes, you can talk. Certainly, you can make requests. And yes, you can tell another person what emotions, what responses their actions stir up in you.
But still, you cannot force them to change.
Believing that you can is a sure way to resentment, frustration and resignation. For both of you.
Instead, can you see the difficulties you are having as an opportunity for your own development, your own unfolding? An opportunity to live in a bigger narrative, one that has space for the chaotic, unpredictable, mysterious beauty and humanity that is each one of you?